The direction of this blog is still unknown to me. What’s known is that I feel a deep need to write again, and for that, I’m grateful.
So far, it feels like an open journal of my journey with God. One filled with poems and words I’ve been unable to say out loud.
As I’ve continued to navigate this season of life, I’m learning so much about who I am within the body of Christ.
And I want to share that journey with others— the great parts, the bad, and the in-between.
Our God is great every single day. But as humans, every day isn’t a great day for us.
For a long time, I thought that as a Christian, allowing myself to feel anything other than the joy that God brings made me less faithful.
But I’m starting to believe that my responsibility as I continue this walk, is to show others that it’s okay to cry. It’s okay to have days when it all feels too heavy.
What’s important is that you continue to look to God through it all. God is truly near to the brokenhearted. (Psalm 34:18). He hears those who call on Him in truth. (Psalm 145:18)
My opinion? Remembering His strength and His power in those moments is a true act of faith.
What I’m learning is this: if you can find even a moment of peace in Him through the tears, you’re stronger than you think.
In my mind, if I can show the greatness of God when I’m standing in the rain, when I talk about the clouds clearing and the sun shining again, maybe you will see His greatness too.
“If you pray for patience, be prepared for God to place you in situations where you won’t have a choice but to be.”
I heard someone say that once, and let me tell you— It’s true.
I prayed for patience in one area of my life—work. That gave God the green light to test and grow my patience in every other aspect. And in ways I never expected.
This season of life has been trying, stretching, draining, grief-filled, and holy.
Through it all, God has not only been drawing me closer to Him— He’s using this time to mold me into the woman I said I wanted to become.
A woman who trusts in Him— in His plan, despite not understanding. A woman whose faith is unwavering in the face of it all. A woman who stops trying to bear the weight herself and gives it all to Him. A woman whose faith is recognized through her peace. A woman whose joy reflects the One she follows.
To become that woman, learning to have more patience is necessary. Not the type of patience that simply waits, but the type that fully trusts while waiting.
I already see it happening.
I have faced many challenges throughout my life. While facing those challenges, I never saw the light at the end of the tunnel. I dwelt in the darkness.
I’ve always believed in God, but there is a difference between believing in Him and knowing Him.
Now that I know Him—His love—His promises, I don’t have to see the light to believe it’s there. I know it’s shining at the end, waiting for my remold to be complete.
Each day, I begin to recognize what it means to be still— To hear his voice. Allow Him to guide my steps. And I realize He’s just been waiting for me, too.
“But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” – Isaiah 40:31
For years, I thought I had simply lost my love for writing—but the truth is, I stopped because my heart was shattered, and my voice was stolen.
I remember being introduced to poetry in elementary school. It was in the 4th grade when I started attempting to write my own. We had a creative writing assignment, and I wrote a short book of poems. My teacher, Mrs. Parker, entered it into the district’s creative writing contest for young writers. I won 2nd place. That was the beginning.
Creative writing became a way of life for me. In a world I didn’t feel like I fit into, the page never made me question if I belonged.
As I got older, if it wasn’t on paper, the notes in my phone became a safe haven for my writings. I always wanted to be a writer. And I had plans for those notes. The problem? I was too afraid of opinions to share my writings with anyone.
Fast forward to junior year of college, and I finally felt safe enough to share my writing—with someone I trusted. That backfired.
He ended up deleting every single note in my phone–every poem, every story. Years of writing, gone. This was the first time I truly experienced heartbreak and betrayal. My emotions haven’t felt safe since. I stopped writing altogether after that violation. My safe space was gone.
Over the years, I would write occasionally, usually when life got hard. It felt so good every time I did. I’d reread any old work I had on my laptop endlessly. Promising myself I’d write again—but I never did.
After years of running from it, I began to miss it. Truly miss it. As life grew hard, I longed for my outlet, but I also began to fear that it had been so long that I wouldn’t be able to do it anymore. That fear deepened as I studied the book of Matthew and read The Parable of the Talents in Matthew Chapter 25, 14-30.
Then, God introduced me to a writer. We quickly became friends and her passion for her craft inspired me. One day, I told her what happened—how my ex deleted my notes. She put it into a context I never thought about before. His deleting those notes was spiritual warfare, and when I stopped writing, I gave power to the enemy. I sat with that statement for a while.
I realized the enemy hadn’t just deleted my notes—he had stolen my voice.
The next time I saw her, she gifted me with a notebook. On the first page, she wrote:
“The Lord has given you a gift. When you’re ready, in His perfect time, use it again. Create words only you and God can.”
All of this happened just as I began feeling the need to grow in my faith and share the Good News of God. However, I don’t do well with social interactions in general, let alone speaking about my beliefs. Just the thought of vocalizing them left me frozen.
Meanwhile, God began shifting everything in my life. Within weeks, the life I knew, the one I had finally grown comfortable with, was stripped away.
I was isolated, facing the most stressful season of my life. All I had left was Him. Yet, amid my pain, I still felt peace.
I was overcome by the desire to share the impact that choosing to walk with God has. Yet, I knew that vocally, I just wasn’t sure how.
I prayed about it. The next day, I opened my bag and saw the gifted notebook I had yet to use. I didn’t even remember packing it, but there it was.
That moment, I realized maybe I couldn’t vocalize God’s message and the peace His love provides. However, I could write about it.
The words have been flowing ever since, and for the first time, sharing them became necessary.
The enemy may have tried to steal the gift God gave me, but I’m writing again–not for validation, but for His glory.
Today is Resurrection Sunday – the day that Jesus rose after sacrificing His life for all of us. Today felt like the perfect day to begin this blog.
In the past, I’ve been afraid to share the gifts He’s given me. At times, I stopped using my gift altogether. But today is a reminder of Christ’s power and authority. His resurrection is not just a moment in history – it’s a symbol of new beginnings and the promise of a transformed life in Christ.
Writing poetry has always been the safest outlet for my emotions. And now, as I go through the toughest season of my life yet, I feel God calling me back to it. This blog will showcase both old and new poetry – words that reflect my healing journey and the way life can be transformed through Him.
As I continue to seek God, I am committed to living in my purpose and sharing my gift without fear. I hope that He uses my words to remind you that you are not alone – and to reveal His power and His love to you.
Welcome to my new beginning. I’m so excited to take this journey with Him – and with whoever feels led to join us.
Guided Words 